Her neck was stiff. Her throat felt tight like the beginning signs of sickness. She had been trying to clear her head all weekend. Had she gotten through all the layers in her life up to this point to be subject to such ignorance. Forgiveness not because of worth. Forgiveness to loosen the bind. The blind spot of hatred created something evil, and it was tangible.
He didn't want to miss any opportunity. He wanted access to whatever was available now or in the future. He wasn't what they call a one woman man. He didn't care about quality. He wasn't looking for genuine. Which was realistic considering his mindset. He wanted to conquer for his fantasy of manhood. He wasn't building an empire. He was building his self worth. He learned people were disposable especially women, those women. His wife would never suspect. He knew she was naive. Her simple understanding of issues calmed his fears. His attentiveness to her made him seem confident, and not calculating. If he stared a little too long at a woman he would make a demeaning comment. An attempt to draw attention away from his leer, other times it would be a playful comment. He seemed like such a well rounded guy it was hard to detect the malice. Why he chose to hang on to evil intentions while being granted an abundance of blessings told a story. A story about the nature of being human. A story about the nature of evil. The evil that is accessible to all human beings. Even neglected remains eager to grow. Evil is immiscible with love but can mimic whatever it needs to satisfy intent. Even without intent hatred is never fully extinguished.
It's not what you think it's what you believe. Patricia '96
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